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First Look For a Wedding

Should you do it or not?

By Ashleigh Cropper

April 3^rd, 2018

"Should I have a first look?!"

That is the big question I hear from nearly every couple I work with, so I am here to write to you, brides and grooms, to list out the pros and cons of a first look.

Bare in mind, this has to be a personal decision. Many times I heard that couples don't want to do a first look because they want their significant other to see them for the first time when they walk down the aisle, which I totally get! But then they list out all the images they want me to take, which would mean right after the ceremony it would be crunch time and close to impossible.

Anyway, here is the list...

Pros

The anxious, nervous jitters will go away! Trust me, emotions run high on your wedding day. Every couple that is on the fence about doing a first look, then decides to do it later tells me they are sooooo so glad they did! I often hear that it was one of their better decisions, and all the nerves washed away without a million eyes on them as they said their vows.
You get a few quiet moments to yourselves. You will still be seeing each other for the first time and can share that excitement in a more private manner.
You get portraits together without rushing. The images of you two are what you will look back on, and generations will see, for many many years. It's an opportunity to really connect on your wedding day too, so don't rush!
You don't have to rush through other wedding-day activities like cocktail hour. Typically many of the images are completed before the ceremony, so then you will have time to get your family photos finished right after the ceremony. I then send my couples on their way to cocktail hour because I believe you should be celebrating with your family and friends who are there to be with YOU!
You get bridal party images all together, with both sides together. It is very hard to capture everyone together after the ceremony because typically that is when you want to take family photos. Bridesmaids and groomsmen will scatter, head over to cocktail hour, and then you have lost your opportunity for pictures all together.
Better lighting = better photos. Let's say your ceremony starts at 6:00. People are in their seats, by 6:15, the bride walks in at 6:20, then somewhere between 6:45 and 7:00, you are pronounced married. There's at least 30 minutes of people milling around and finally by 7:45, we start taking couple's and family photos. In many places, particularly in the mountains, you're approaching twilight at that point, and you may not be as happy with how your photos turn out.
Your photographer gets some time to be more creative and deliberate. I am able to really capture the mood of the day when I'm not having to run around rushed, and cramming a whole list of images into one quick 45 minutes after the wedding. (Side note: I say it takes 2-3 minutes per family grouping for an image. If you have 15 family groupings, then there goes your 45 minutes and no time for you two as a couple for images because cocktail hour just ended.)

cons

The first time you see your lovely fiancé in their suite/dress won't be from down the isle. Maybe that's just the way you envisioned it since you were 11 so that's how it's going to be. There is a certain romantic appeal to the first reveal being at the ceremony and maybe that's what you want.
Keeping up with tradition. It's true that a first look is less traditional. Many couples want to keep with tradition for their wedding day. These days, we're certainly less accustomed to tradition than our parents or grandparents may have been, but there's just something about weddings that make us want to hold on to a few of them.
More time to get ready. Not having a first look allows you slow down a bit while getting ready. Since getting hair and makeup done, and putting on your dress or suit is rarely a solitary activity, it's a chance to be with your friends or family. Sometimes my couples really cherish those last few moments before their vows to be with their loved ones.

Hopefully those pros and cons help with deciding what direction you lean toward.

I will always say, the wedding is not about the vendors, or me the photographer, or the venue or the guests, or even your parents. This is your day! That may come with some sacrifices no matter which direction you take, but a wedding day is all about you two !

If not seeing one another till the ceremony is important to you, then do it that way. If you have a big list of photos you want to make sure you get, then I might suggest a first look, because sometimes it just can't all fit in without making concessions for it. Either way, it is your choice and something you should definitely discuss with your fiancé.